65. Numb

The young nurse who posted her before and after coronavirus work shift photos online was interviewed on television on the Friday Newshour; the word she used was “numb.” She and her colleagues are concerned for a public that doesn’t believe that the illness is serious, concerned for their patients—and moving forward on numb.

 

The specifics are bad: over 1700 health care workers have died; most nurses working with Covid-19 patients are not being tested unless symptomatic (while the country and economy finds enough money for continuous testing of pro and college athletes); and there are just not enough health care workers nationally to deal with the rising numbers of covid patients in hospitals and intensive care units. Over 80,000 hospitalized Americans at last count.

 

During my two weeks of splendid isolation in quarantine I sometimes felt embarrassed at my good fortune. I had plenty of food and water, a good roof and warm bed away from any possibility of my infecting others. I got a daily call from the medical folks, and each day that symptoms did not show up was a small triumph I would take with me on a nice hike to the lakeshore or up a mountain trail.  

 

And I’d sometimes think about the people of the Navajo Nation who have no place to quarantine or enough health care workers to look after them. Or the Indians in South Dakota who tried to quarantine themselves with roadblocks, and were overrun by a governor who doesn’t believe the disease is serious—not serious enough to postpone the Sturgis motorcycle rally or a presidential rally at Mt. Rushmore. And how many sicknesses and deaths rolled out across the country from those two events, my troubled mind asks.

 

I grow tired of these reports—tired maybe my response to anger without outlet, tired with this whole coronavirus event. I’ve grown tired of the election campaign as well, and the endless lawsuits by people who do not trust the election system and won’t listen to rebukes by state government officials and judges.

 

Our fatigue can only end with Covid-19’s retreat—it won’t be an easy or complete victory, but the hope is that this virus will at least join measles and the flu as rare and/or manageable. Meanwhile we plug on, tired, but knowing that health workers can’t afford tired, and must rely on numb. 

 

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